Do you blame yourself for the bad choices your teen daughter has chosen lately? Is she making worldly choices or choosing paths that have you wondering what has happened to her? Does she blame you for her misfortunes? We’ve all been there – our great grandparents, our grandparents, our parents, and now us, the parents of a new generation of teens. It’s the generational blame game. We blame the previous generation for the questionable choices we make in our lives. Three words can break the link of the generational game that will set you free – It is finished.

The phrase, “It is finished,” is the sixth statement Jesus spoke before He died on the cross for our sins. Jesus finished His work on earth when He carried all of our sins on His shoulders with all the blame, shame and guilt. Every sin was wiped clean for those who believe in Him and to set us free. The blame game is finished.

Here are some suggestions to help you let go of parental guilt.

  1. Celebrate your victories as a parent. Often, we focus on the mistakes we have made and forget about the positive encouraging things we do right and the blessings we provide. Jesus said, “It is finished.” Move on from the mistakes and keep working toward the victories.
  2. Acknowledge your mistakes and mess-ups. Be quick to apologize. By watching you take responsibility for your mistakes, your teen daughter will learn to take responsibility for her own actions and mistakes.
  3. Let go of your blame and guilt. Don’t be chained by guilt. Submit your feelings and regrets to the Lord and let Him take control. When He died for you, He took all of your sins and mistakes with Him and proclaimed, “It is finished.” Believe His words.

Like is too short to look back and wonder what you could’ve done better. Instead, look forward and set your eyes on today and the blessings in life that Jesus has given you.

Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead (Philippians 3:13 ESV).